welcome to the mudrealm

a trip she took

hello china, she came this week
inspect inspect, my room she search
lingerie, hair, lipsticks, shoe
nothing she find, or at least i hope
instead another she found all hunky and all
hengster my friend, retired u be
so out here she goes , hunting away

FEED ME she screams, often it seems
abalone dumplings, her face she stuff
"next course" she screams, more food i ply

The food down here, slightly greasy some say
"slightly?" no sir, more like drowning say i
this fish they had, ingrediants i tell
1 Fish, lotsa chili
1 BIG FREAKING TUB OF OIL
this tub we ate, magic it had
my eyes i blink, suddenly i see
my love she looks, gorgeous be she

万岁万岁万万岁

forbidden city, in here i recide
for now at least, emperor of all
on throne i pearch，survey the world
皇帝 they scream!
万岁万岁万万岁!
adoration i get, sometimes too much

city of mine, beauty there is
every corner, every street
suprises u find, everywhere there is

golden darlings these be, my realm they guard
beauties aren't they, playful they be
be gentle with them, for sometimes they bite

stud of beijing, everywhere be he
big pic of him, right on the gate
uncle mao and me, studs of beijing
how hot are we, this city we rule

Melon Hunting

Palm trees, sunny skies, Melons everywhere
Vision I get, when krabi is heard
Short trip I took, some sun I needed
Feast awaits me, my eyes be eager
Welcome I got, rainy it was
Beach I hit in search of melons
Nothing I found, not even grapes
Oh well thought I, tomorrow be better
Woke up I did, so did the sun
So sure was I , that melons abound
Empty was beach, but undaunted be I
Further I search, boat I took
4 islands I went, to no avail
Melons it seems, were not in season.........

melons aside, holiday it was
food food and more food,
the waist it grew, my mouth i stuff,
5 meals aday? that be the norm,
oh shit, say i
tailor i need, old pants too tight
next week i know, there's hell to pay
threadmill i'll hit, this time i hope

WTF@$##$ he's Blogging again

OhmybeepingbeepingGOSH
Mudgod be back,more trash he got
why havn't u blog, many have asked
simple be it, reason i have
grew sick i did, pain's clutches i dread
the dark side i fell, light i never saw
DOTA my friend, crave it I still
a drug it was, my brain it stole
rapier in hand, to battle i stride
blows countered, spells ignored
aegis i called, my butt it saved
spikey i spied, spikey i diced
GODLIKE....TRIPLE KILL
these words resound, my memories they ring
for now it seems, this drug be gone
happiness this dream, i find no more

"Married? WHen?? PRove it!"

free i be, in office today i was
email this tool, my favourite it is
chit chat i did, with mudcake old friend
poor dude he was, cross line he did
big bash he had, the world he told
owned now by lynn, the truth be told
"Beijing young girls" topic popped up
"yummy, bo chio!" those words he said
"married aren't you?" was sure i was (I PAID ANG POW LEH!)
"Married? WHen?? PRove it!" exact words he typed
he's wife i know, my blog she reads
in head i see, mudcake on kneels
tonight i fear, outside he sleeps
HAHA my friend, married u be

CONGRATES i give, to wifey only
(SPARE THE ROD AND SPOIL THE HUBBY!!)
(THINK HE LIKES WHIPS TOO)

The HOrdE

mudrealm i rule, armies i command
sunny it be, parade i think
generals they barked
"FALL IN SLACKERS"
away i go, inspect inspect.

God's Piss?

DaSleaze here, most famous gossip reporter am I
nothing goes on in mudrealm without me knowing
recently scored the scope of the year
got exclusive interview with mudgal on her trip down under

Beer known as nectar of god, god's piss and blahblahblah
basically the bloody best drink on a hot day
I accompanied he's godship mudgod and he's extremely drunk goddess miss p in a tour of Perth's nectar gardens

First stop just to warm up was the microbrewery in fremantle right smack next to where they stayed.
Cherub's piss is reallll good
got the two of them humming about all night long

http://www.littlecreatures.com.au/
try the pale ale, pilsner or Roger's Amber Ale
absolutely smooth
dun believe, look at this 2

There's the holy grail!!!!
fountain of youth
and yada yada yada

Round 2
My personal favourite
packed with lotsa flavours and cheap to boot
http://www.wickedalebrewery.com.au/

Beer's MENT TO BE SHARED you dweeb

Yeah yeah just drink it all down
remember the calories

MUST TRY: Lavender Beer, absolutely gorgeous, sexier than my angelina

Last stop
The much talked about bootleg brewery and their RAGING BULL beckons
by now the small car that we were squished in was zipping by single lane country roads at 120km/hr FUELED BY ALCOHAL

The place was packed with people screaming at each other
last 10 minutes of the West Coast Eagles playing Freo Dockers at Subi
weird people that play football on a round pitch hammering each other

finally we got our beer and retired to sample nature's bestest brew
but what's beer without food
miss p went back inside for some oily chow and appeared back again in precisely 30 secs! FACE ALL BLACK
watch the video u dweeeb i'm not telling u why.